Scallops With Fennel Tempura, Chicken Satay Skewers, Fried Spicy Tofu Salad

I have a typical morning routine. If I am not breaking planks of wood with my head in the garden, you might find me slicing concrete blocks in half with my bare hands on the porch. Depending on the weather really. And it was one such morning last week that I felt inspired to attempt an Asian themed tapas night. For most of my mature adult life, my experience of Chinese food went as far as 'gizacurryships'natrayforfugsakewillya'. However we had a great Chinese meal earlier this week (authentic - but it took a lot of effort to get our waitress to give us the real-proper-no chips on this menu - menu) and I watched Karate Kid twice when I was younger. So I felt pretty qualified for the job at hand. With such knowledge and insight, I could not fail.

I will admit that I did try to recreate this from the brilliant tofu salad in said Chinese restaurant earlier this week. And I failed miserably. However, this packed such a huge spicy kick that I was happy enough. Especially as it was tofu. And me and tofu are a bit like North and South Korea.

I got my wok nice a hot, added some red onions and garlic and chili and cooked for a minute constantly stirring shaking and spilling the food on the floor. I added some teaspoons of homemade Chinese 5 spice, cloves, fennel seeds, cinnamon, coriander seeds and dried chili. I added the finely sliced tofu, beansprouts, spring onions, more chili and some chili powder and did some more pan-shaking and tossing, which really just lets the heat out of the pan AND if you are as talented as I am in the kitchen, most of the food ends up on the walls. Bang the edge of the pot with your spoon (wooden is good but the sound from plastic can be a bit sharper, however, if you have a metal spoon, you are one pot-bang away from being a true cook). I like to bang the pot every 10-15 seconds usually 3 times, making sure the third strike is the loudest. Your guests (and neighbours) will be really impressed. Garnish with coriander to make it look you have a leprechaun's elbow what you are doing.

I find the most pleasure comes from the dish that takes ages to cook and has at least 30-40 ingredients and needs a small army to assemble. It should take at least 15 minutes to assemble whereby once ready, half the dish should have gone cold. Chicken breast on a skewer with a spicy peanut satay sauce is not one of those dishes.

For the satay sauce, I cooked some diced shallot, garlic, lemon grass and chili and galangal in a little oil for a minute or two. I added a homemade Massaman curry paste (normally you would use red curry paste but I made the Massaman earlier in the week, so tough). Cook the paste until it becomes fragrant, then add the smooth peanut butter. Usually about 1 tbsp of curry paste, 2 tbsp of peanut butter and a tin of coconut milk. Once the butter has melted, gently whisk in your milk, add your chopped unsalted peanuts and some coriander. Once the sauce is ready it can be gently re-heated. I skewered the chicken and seasoned with a lot of pepper and chili powder. Then I got my griddle pan good and hot, brushed some oil over the skewers and cooked, turning them as the cooked until done. The add your hot satay sauce to the chicken once they are on the plate. Don't forget to remove the skewers when eating.

This is so simple and looks and tastes like you have been slaving away all day in the kitchen. I bought some picked ginger, to which I added some apple and fennel. I then got some vinegar, white wine, sliced lemon and lime, lemongrass stalks, peppercorns and cloves. I brought it all to the boil in a pan, removed from the heat and let it cool. I then set it aside until needed. Next up, finely slice some fennel and bake it for about 15 mins with some lemon juice, salt and pepper. Let it cool. Make a simple quickly tempura-ish batter of flour, sparkly water, chili powder, salt and beaten egg and a good pinch of salt. Add roasted fennel and shallow fry until golden (or burnt if the wine is kicking in as it was in my case!), remove and drain on some kitchen paper.

Arrange the pickle on the plate, add the tempura fennel. Then cook the scallops. Heat a little oil then add your scallops. Take a short break now to drink some wine - don't touch those scallops until.........nnnnnow. They should have that nice brown colour, add a knob of butter and turn the scallops, as the butter browns you can baste the scallops in it. Then remove straight away onto the plate. I had some homemade mayo knocking about, to which I added some coriander. I topped each scallop with a tiny blob of this. Garnish with some coriander because you think it makes you a better cook.

The sad news is that I will be doing the tapas again next week, but fret not, P-eile will be cooking the next two weeks after that.

Shopping List:

Veggies €1.15

Free-range Irish Chicken breast (local butcher) €3.00

Fresh Scallops €6.70

Tofu €1.60
Pickled Ginger €1.60

Peanut Butter €2.20

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Total €16.25 ...ooops

Drinks:
Lunate, Fiano, Sicilia, 13%
Domaine Pierre Blanche, Minervois, 2006, 13%

On the strereo
Ojos De Brujo, Gorillaz, Local Natives, Souls of Mischief