Black Pudding Croquettes, Eden Smokies, Duck with Parsnip

Looks can be deceiving. Think of that ugly duck we all heard about as kids. Where is he or she now? Probably writing agony duck columns in some duck tabloid newspaper for all the other ugly ducklings. Giving them advice about how it doesn't matter what's on the outside or how you look, it's what's inside that counts. A bit like this weeks tapas entry.

You see, the black pudding croquettes may not look like a, eh swan? but they taste really really good. Any left overs are particularly good the next morning with scrambled eggs with Harissa on toast. Yes we could have breaded these babies up - but we chose not to and we are standing by that decision. Kinda. The point is, they taste so nice regardless. As do the Eden smokies - which are so easy to make and, if you scale up the recipe, they are a perfect thing to give you a big kiss on a cold autumnal eve. Assuming that kissing smoked fish is your thing. If not ! Fear not ! Kill the aforementioned duck and have it with parsnip crisps! Enjoy!

Black Pudding Croquettes With Sweet Woodruff & Whiskey Jelly

Ingredients: 3 potatoes; black pudding (as much as you can handle); 1/2 red onion; 3 tbsp cider vinegar; 2 tbsp Dijon mustard; salt & pepper

Cook your potatoes in salted water until done, drain and mash without adding any milk, cream or butter. Season. Peel the black pudding and cook in some oil for a couple of mins. Add to the mash along with the mustard, sliced red onion, vinegar and mix. Taste and adjust your pants.

Form croquette shapes using your hands and allow them to rest for about 30mins in the fridge. You can get croquette beds that fit in fridges in good kitchen supply stores.

You should probably roll the croquettes in some breadcrumbs for a nice golden finish - alas Salty Squid didn't. We just fried them off and the finished result - while tasting great, they were a bit harsh on the eye.

For the jelly, just add some hot water to some Woodruff jelly - add a drop or a pint of whisky, mix well and leave in the fridge to set for two hours or so.

Eden Smokies

Ingredients: 350g smoked cod, diced; handful of cherry tomatoes, halved; few spring onions, springs removed; 3tbsp of creme fraiche, yum; lots and lots of black pepper, ah-chew; couple of elbow fulls of grated cheddar, cheesy

This is best done on a camping stove set up on the back of a trailer. Heat your pan or whoever's pan, I really don't care, on a moderate heat, not so moderate that anything goes, but not so unmoderate (another salty makey uppy wordy) either. Add the smoked cod and cook for a minute. Next add the tomatoes and spring onions and continue to cook. Add 2 of the tbsp of creme fraiche, then the third, Stir well - as in stir the pan well, not run to the end of the garden with a huge - HUGE wooden spoon and stir the well. In fact, you might not even have a garden. Or a well. Or if you do have a garden with a well, maybe you don't have a big enough wooden spoon.

Portion up the creamy mess into small individual dishes and pop under the grill. Or you can just sprinkle cheese over the lot and stick your pan under the grill for a minute, trying to lick some of the crispy cheese off the pan as it grills. Painful but worth it. Then serve.

Pretentious Pan-Seared Duck Breast with Parsnip Crisps and Roast Parsnip Puree and Red Wine and Quince Jus (yeah whatever)

Ingredients: Duck breast, fat well scored ideally 3 goals per game; parsnip, a little bit shaved, the rest chopped; clove of garlic; smoked paprika, a bit of milk, a bit of red wine; a bit of quince; a bit of love

Heat the oven to 180c. Add the chopped parsnip, clove of garlic and smoked paprika to a tray and drizzle with oil. Mix it all together and stick it into the oven until the parsnip is soft and cooked. Blitz, using a bit of milk to loosen it and give it a pureeeyeey consistency. Season well. Loads of black pepper.

For the parsnip crisps, heat some rapeseed oil in pan, add the thinly shaved parsnips, fry until golden, remove and drain on some kitchen paper. Sprinkle with salt.

Heat a pan on a medium heat, add the duck breast skin side down. Don't add any oil or butter to the pan as you want to render all the fat out of the duck breast. Continue to cook skin side down for about 5 mins until the skin is brown and crisp. Drain the fat from the pan and flip the breast over the the flesh side. Seal the flesh for about 2 mins then turn again back to the skin side for another 3-4 mins before giving the flesh side another final blast for a min or two. Remove and rest the breast for about 10mins before slicing it with a sharp knife. You can cook it for a bit less if you prefer it more rare.

Arrange the breast on top of the puree with the crisps on top of the duck. Drizzle with the red wine, which you made by reducing some wine (which also had some quince paste thrown in) to a syrupy consistency and seasoned well.

In the glass

Domain Grand Nicolet, Rasteau, 14.5%